Dictionary of Unknown Organ Stops
Although I did a Bachelor of Music before studying electronics, my major instrument was trumpet, so I didn't know a whole lot about pipe organs when I first started working here. I'm finding I'm still learning a lot. The following list of previously unknown pipe stops was found on http://www.tadstone.com/unknown.htm. I hope you find it as educational as I did.
Only played to put the audience to sleep. Often played with the 16' Boredom.
8' Stopped-up Flute
Keep the Roto-Rooter man on call if you have one of these in the organ.
The loudest flute stop in the organ.
Cross between a Krummhorn and a Trumpet. Mainly used to accompany Tea Dances.
Large caliber pedal stop. It is wise to buy only the smokeless powder version of this stop. Its biggest disadvantage is the necessity to reload in the middle of long bass passages.
32' Counter Bombardment
A really macho complement to the 16' Bombardment. Place these two on opposite sides of the organ and watch the fireworks! Not recommended for buildings constructed of un-reinforced masonry.
Played to offset the headache generated by playing the 16' Bombardment and the 32' Counter Bombardment.
Extremely loud and rude pedal stop. Useful with the 4' Flatulence.
Reed stop of African origin. Smells mildly of bananas.
Belongs in the X-Rates division of the organ along with the Sexaphone, the HotBois, and the Gemshorny.
A short Italian version of the Gamba. When this stop speaks, you listen - if you know what's good for you.
8' Violent Diapason
Makes a good match with the 4' Gambino to accompany gangster films.
4' Spits Flute
A raincoat is recommended when playing this one. Isolate this stop to keep it from warping the wooden pipes.
One of the few really new organ stops. Requires cable or satellite connection.
8' Trumped up
Not a real organ stop at all. Invented by an unscrupulous organ salesman to make the stop tabs symmetrical
Shabby and poorly made stop. Grateful for any spare change the turner might have
Made from old wine bottles. More colorful than the Chardonnay IV
8' Geiger Diapason
Made of (almost) depleted Uranium. Easy to find because it glows in the dark. When tuning this stop, it is wise to don your lead-lined underwear.
6 7/8' Genetic Mutation
A stop which spontaneously appeared nest to the 8' Geiger Diapason
2 2/3' Lizard
Keep this away from the 8' Geiger Diapason. Might mutate into a 10 2/3' Godzilla.
8' Vox Inhumana
A short stubby reed which is nearly impossible to keep in tune.
1 1/3' Lariat
Originally developed in Texas to accompany Western films.
5 1/3' Quint Eastwood
Another part of the Western division of the organ alongside the Lariat